items from the mind of an idiot savant

not fit for print

My current girlfriend and I have only been dating a few weeks now. We decided that our relationship was still too fresh to go all out for Valentines Day. So instead we thought it was a good idea to simply not see each other on the great day. Well by the end of end of the day commemorating the annual celebration of lovers, we both broke down and called each other on the phone. I’m such a fool for romance.

It was getting late and we both had work in the morning. We missed the opportunity to even see each other on Valentines. I felt a bit stupid about the whole thing and promised to make it up to her by taking her on a nice romantic weekend getaway. After all it was a holiday weekend and getting out of town for a few days with a pretty woman was just what the doctor ordered.

I booked a room at the Four Seasons in Santa Barbara. I though we could hang out and just be lazy, until Sunday when we could go to their world famous brunch. But little ever goes as planned.

We ended up leaving a bit late Friday night since I had been working late all week. I ran home from work, packed and then picked her up. She wasn’t so happy about running late, but since I’m notoriously early or on time, I was forgiven.

The bad weather made the drive a bit rough. By the time we got there, it was rather late. We had a bit of a scare when they counter clerk told us that since we were so late that they had given our room away and they were all booked up. After some reservation computer voodoo they managed to find us a room. It was one of the best rooms they had. It was this tiny dungeon right by the kitchen and the laundry room. I think they called it the ghetto honeymoon suite or something like that.

Amy hadn’t been feeling well much of the week. Whatever it was that she had, decided to really make itself known the next day. We woke up to the sounds of dishes breaking, and Amy spent most of the morning in the bathroom vomiting.

So Friday sucked. Saturday sucked.

We both grew tired of trying to make lemonade out of lemons. We passed on brunch, and since I had to cancel Monday to come home and work, we just headed home early.

When I got home, there were about 20 phone messages from my family looking wondering where I was. After listening to 12 messages, and reading 5 emails I called my folks.

My mother answered the phone crying yet relieved to hear from me. She passed the phone to my father. He told me that they have been looking for me. They went to my place and knocked on my door. They had all my cousins out driving around looking for me. And they called the police and filed a missing persons report.

I had to call the police and close out the case.

So much drama!

So I had a crappy weekend. My folks freaked out, and Amy’s mad at me for having to cut things short. She says I work too much. She might be right. I had to cut things short to work, and I had to cancel a date earlier in the week on account of work, and I think I had to cancel the week before too on account of work. And now she wants to go to a concert in the middle of the week and I can’t commit since I might need to work. I wouldn’t be surprised if she dumped me for all this. I really have been working a lot lately, and neglecting other people in my life.

Whoa is me, whoa is me!

I thought writing this all would make me feel better, but it hasn’t. What a waste.

A few weeks later, Amy and I were together. It was late at night, and my cell phone rang. A coworker was calling. I figured he was just drunk and calling me for no good reason, so I didn’t answer. Amy was a bit upset by it all. I guess to her it appears my life revolves around work.

I haven’t heard from her since that night. I guess that’s all over. It’s a bit funny that the late night call from a coworker was what broke the camel’s back. I later found out that he was calling me to hook me up with some gorgeous girl who was in need of a good man.

I lost one girl, and the opportunity to be with another all at the same time. Now THAT takes talent.

By the way, now I really feel better.

Um, I’m a bit too old to still be in school, but our office does have a collegiate compus feel to to it, and the the prettiest girl at work talked to me the other day.

I’M SUCH A ROMANTIC FOOL OF A LOSER! All we talked about was the weather and morning commute times. It was no big deal. Its just that I’m so dumbfounded by her. She’s so self-confident and pretty. Every time she walk by I have to stop what I’m doing and take a breath, even when she doesn’t look my way.

It must be her amazing smile. Her smile is like a ray of joy from heavan coming to light even the dimmest of spaces. All she has to do is smile at you, and instantly she begins to make things better.

You need people like that in your life.
Even if we never get to be friends, at least I get to stare at her supremely fine figure every time she walks by.

While I’m on the topic of dating. I went out with this girl a few weeks ago. We had a great time. The conversation was flowing pretty well with the occasional stoppage to swallow some food or check the score of the Laker game.

We get along well. The times we spent talking on the phone were fun and it was easy to pass an hour or two talking to her.

She was doing her best to make it obvious that she was interested. She was laughing at my jokes, giving me little touches as she handed me the serving spoon, looking at me with that come hither look.

After dinner we walked back to her place, and she invited me up. In that split second between her asking me up and words coming out of my mouth, I remembered that scene from Nine Months were he drops the girl off at her door after the date. She asks “Want to come up for some coffee?”
“No thanks, I don’t drink coffee.” He replies
“Want to come up for sex?”

The point being that when a girl invites you in, go! I didn’t want to have sex with someone I didn’t really know, but I didn’t want to say no, and make her feel like I rejected her. I just met this girl, and I didn’t want to ruin everything on the first date.

So, I went up. I played with her little dog and we sat on the couch talking and watching TV for a bit. I was a bit uncomfortable, but I think it’s just my head issues that were causing all that.

I was exhausted, and I almost fell asleep on her couch. When I left, she walked me out to the car. She may have leaned in for a kiss as we went to hug goodnight, but I was a bit out of it, and didn’t really notice. As I got in my car, she asked me to call her when I got home to make sure I got home OK.

Is that socially acceptable? It was just a first date. A good first date, but a first date nonetheless. Do people who are casually dating do things like call late at night make sure you got home ok?

So this girl called me. That’s great! I like it when a girl shows some initiative. I called her back, but I’ve been so busy lately, that I didn’t really have time to talk. I promised her I’d caller her back and make date sometime this weekend. Sounds good?

I was rather freaked out today when I got an text message on my phone from a girl I broke up with back over 6 months ago.

She wrote: “Wish you were inside me.”

I think I may learn how to get a restraining order.

I met this completely gorgeous and awesome girl about a month back. And like most relationship in my she has 1 small fatal flaw. She lives on the other side of the continent in another country. That’s like 3,500 miles away yo!.

My younger cousin told me that a couple of her friends remember me from a visit many many years back, and they were apparently joking about how cute I was and which one of them could win my affection, or something like that. I guess my cousin was trying not to tell me too much due to some secret code of sisterhood.

I met one of the girls, and she was amazing. We had a great chat over coffee and while we wondered around the local video store. Overall a nice interaction, and I don’t think she noticed the few times when I stumbled over myself. I was going back home the next day, and we parted ways with hopes of maybe meeting again someday or possibly coming out to visit me.

I figure the only way I could ever make anything manifest out of all this was to follow through. I vowed to either write her an email about once a week or just drop the whole thing. Apparently my first 2 attempts at making contact failed. A technical glitch!?! My free e-mail provider screwed something up, and I lost about a week’s worth of e-mail. IMPORTANT e-mail! I switched to a more reliable and commercial provider.

Yesterday I thought I’d give it one more try. I sent a real short and simple email to her, not expecting to hear back. I had to try, right? I heard back from here this morning! I doubt anything will come of this all, but she seems really awesome, and I really want to get to know her, and hopefully spend some time with her.